Relationship Development
Relationship development that occurs during
adolescence:Changes in adolescent physical and cognitive development are also
accompanied by major changes in an adolescent's relationships with others
- including family members and friends. Family relationships are often
reorganized with the onset of puberty, the desire for increased autonomy,
and increased emotional distance between teens and their parents.
Adolescent attention often shifts to a more intense focus on social
interactions and friendships expanding from same sex friends to same sex
groups of friends to heterosexual groups of friends. Sexual maturity marks
the need to reorganize friendships again, to include an increased interest
in opposite sex relationships and dating.
Developmental changes in relationship with self:
It is also during adolescence, with a focus on changing relationships
with others, that a new understanding of one's self emerges. This may
include changes in the following self-concepts:
- independence
Independence is defined as making decisions for one's self and acting on
the basis of one's own thought processes, judgment, and decision making.
Part of the developmental process for adolescents is to learn to work
out one's own problems independently. With increasing cognitive and
intuitive abilities, adolescents begin to face new responsibilities and
to enjoy independent thoughts and actions. Adolescents begin to have
thoughts and fantasies about their future and adult life (i.e., college
or job training, work, and marriage).
- identity
Identity is defined as a sense of self or self knowledge about one's
characteristics, or personality. One of the fundamental tasks of
adolescence is to achieve a sense of a personal identity and a secure
sense of self. As an adolescent gains comfort with, and acceptance of, a
more mature physical body, learns to use his/her own judgment, learns to
make decisions independently, and addresses his/her own problems, he/she
begins to develop a concept of himself/herself as an individual, and
thus an identity. Difficulty in developing a clear concept of self or
identity occurs when an adolescent is unable to resolve struggles about
who he/she is as a physical, sexual, and independent person.
- self-esteem
Self-esteem is defined as the feelings one has about one's self.
Self-esteem is determined by answering the question "How much do I like
myself?" With the onset of adolescence, a decrease in self-esteem is
somewhat common - based on the many body changes occurring, new thoughts
being developed, and new ways of thinking about things becoming more and
more apparent. During adolescence, teens become more thoughtful about
who they are and who they want to be. They notice differences in the way
they act and the way they think they should act. Once teens start
thinking about their actions and characteristics, they are confronted
with how they judge themselves. Adolescent females tend to place
importance on attractiveness. When teens do not perceive themselves as
attractive, it often causes poor self-esteem. Females tend to have less
self-esteem than males. Typically, self-esteem increases during late
adolescence as teens develop a better sense of who they are.
Developmental changes in peer relationships:The amount of time spent with friends increases during the
course of adolescence. Most often, teenagers enjoy the time they spend
with their friends more than other activities. They report feeling more
understood and accepted by their friends. Less and less time is spent with
parents and other family members.
Close friendships tend to develop between teens that are more similar
in nature, interest, social class, and ethnic backgrounds, than younger
age friendships. While childhood friends tend to be based on common
activities, adolescent friendships expand to include similarities in
attitudes, values, loyalty, and intimacy, as well as common activities.
Teen friendships also tend to be more similar in level of involvement in
academic and educational interest. Especially for girls, close, intimate,
self-disclosing conversations with friends help to explore identities and
define one's sense of self. Conversations within these important
friendships also assist adolescents in exploring their sexuality and how
they feel about it. The friendships of adolescent boys are less likely to
be as intimate than those of girls. Boys are more prone to form an
alliance with a group of friends who validate each other's worth through
actions and deeds rather than interpersonal disclosure.
Developmental changes in male-female relationships:
The adolescent transition to male-female and sexual
relationships is influenced by sexual interest and by social and cultural
influences and expectations. Social and cultural expectations and
behaviors in male-female or sexual relationships are learned from
observations and practice. During adolescence, developmental tasks include
struggles to gain control over sexual and aggressive urges, and
discovering new and appealing potential or actual love relationships.
Sexual behaviors during adolescents may include impulsive behavior, a wide
range of experimental interactions of mutual exploring, and eventually
intercourse. Biological differences, and differences in the socialization
of males and females, set the stage for males and females to have
different expectations of sexual and love relationships that may influence
sexual experiences and may also have consequences for later sexual
behavior and partnerships. Ultimately, achievement of a mutually
satisfying sexual partnership within a love relationship may be
established.
Developmental changes in family relationships:One of the developmental tasks of adolescence is to achieve
separation from one's family as one emerges into an independent young
adult. A part of this process is coming to terms with specific feelings
about one's family. During adolescence, teens begin to realize that their
parents and significant authority figures do not know everything or have
solutions to all types of struggles. Some teenage rebellion against
parents is common and normal. With the onset of puberty, adolescent
females tend to have more disagreements with their mothers. Adolescent
males, especially those who mature early, also tend to have more
disagreements with their mothers than with their fathers. While over time
disagreements often decrease, adolescent relationships with mothers tend
to change more than adolescent relationships with fathers. As adolescents
become more independent from their parents, they are more likely to turn
to their peers for advice.
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